Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Elf on the Shelf

Santa Claus has some admittedly disturbing aspects when it comes to his monitoring. "He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake." Santa clearly monitors everyone's behavior, but in his case it's designed more in a karmic sense. His generosity and good will allow you to give him the benefit of the doubt. After all, it's his presents - he gets to select the criteria he wants to use to hand them out.

"Elf on the Shelf" takes the fundamental creepiness of 24-hour monitoring and goes full bore with it. The express purpose of the "tradition" is to modify a child's behavior by providing a physical reminder that they are being watched and that all of their secrets are being shared with grown-ups/authority figures. This is not some far away person deciding if you're worthy of his gifts. This is a physical spy noting everything you do and making sure those in power know about it - and you're expected to obey and comply otherwise you won't receive any alms.

Jack Skellington step aside. We just found an actual Nightmare Before Christmas.

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