Review: 50 Shades of Grey

On Valentine's, I was taken to the theater to watch 50 Shades of Grey. It's not a film I'd subject myself to otherwise, but my date was quite insistent. I thought I'd write down my impressions of it.

As much as I was expecting to, I did not hate it. The director and screenwriter changed a lot from the source material, all of it for the better. Indeed, pretty much everything good about the movie is attributable to the director and two lead actors, while everything wrong comes from the original book. Is it a good movie? No. Is it a move you can watch without bleeding out your eyeballs? Yes. I would rank the movie higher on the enjoyability scale than several big budget summer blockbusters, for example. The director and screenwriter could have given us a much better film if they hadn't been so constrained by the garbage they had to start with.

For starters, the soundtrack is one of the best parts of the film. The songs are all well performed and chosen. I particularly liked Annie Lennox's cover of "I Put a Spell on You" that plays near the beginning. Beyonce's "Crazy in Love" cover was also enjoyable.

The movie does not open well, though. The initial meeting between the two characters is boring and stilted and thing don't perk up until the film's first comedic moment, when Anastasia blurts out "Are you gay?" and proceeds to be flustered. Comedy - of a very quirky sort - is the film's number one saving grace that makes the first two-thirds of it quite watchable. The director understood that the books were garbage and proceeded to do what she needed to to fix that.

That first humorous moment is joined by a host of others with comedic timing that plays out wonderfully. The best delivered line in the film comes after Grey suddenly appears where Anastasia works. In the book, this is supposed to be some kind of romantic high point. Here, Ana's reaction is "What the fu-?" Dakota Johnson perfectly captures a realistic reaction to this kind of stalker behavior by being simultaneously surprised, intrigued, and horrified by it.

My favorite scene - and one of the few scenes in the film that feels like a proper cinematic feature - is when Ana and Christian are negotiating the terms of the contract. The lighting, editing, dialogue, pacing - everything works. Both actors are in synch (sadly the only time, more on that later) and react to one another in both obvious and subtle ways. When Ana crosses things off, Jamie Dornan conveys just the right amount of frustrated regret for the limits. When Grey proposes counter-offers, Dakota Johnson gives off the look of someone with serious contemplation. The juxtaposition of a formal business setting during which two adults are discussing such a sensitive and taboo topic such as sexual submission gives the whole scene a nice surreal edge and an energy that is lacking in the more explicit scenes. It's not surprising the director created this from whole cloth; it bears a stamp of quality lacking everywhere else. I'd even recommend watching a short clip of just that scene to get a taste of how this film could have gone had the studio not given the author so much control.

Individually, Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan do an admirable job with what they're handed. Dakota is the better of the two - she injects Ana with a spirit that's lacking in the Bella-clone novel counterpart. She also comes off as an equally cute Zooey Deschanel archetype. Now and then, Jamie Dornan will do a half-smile expression. This makes him look remarkably like Tobey Maguire. So all through the movie, I was wondering when Grey is going to put on a Spider-Man costume. Other jokes that ran through my mind:

Mr. Parker will see you now.

When they do the upside down kiss in this movie, it'll be Mary Jane who's suspended.

Spidey has a new use for his webbing.

The safe word is "amazing."

And so on. On one hand, this did ruin some of the immersion. On the other hand, it made watching the film much more amusing than it otherwise would've been.

But while I like the individual actors during some of the film, they are rarely in-synch with one another. Everything being said about their lack of chemistry is true. When Dakota Johnson is in full gear as an Anastasia who is lively, curious, and possessed by inner energy, Jamie Dornan  chooses those moments to slip into a sulky, spoiled brat demeanor meant to be "smoldering" but coming off as pouty. When Dornan finds purchase with Grey as an emotionally damaged person due to early childhood and teenage abuse, Johnson has slipped into a whiny, one-note performance that repeats the same lines over and over.

This translates as well into what most people think of when it comes to the franchise: the sex scenes. Every single one is lackluster. I found myself yawning more often than being aroused. They are shot and edited as largely artistic affairs, meant more to reflect power or primal energy rather than titillate. The only scene where there was any sensual energy was a brief one where the two share time in a tub. The rest lose any eroticism they might have had due to wooden choreography. By comparison, I found the scenes of Girl with a Dragon Tattoo (either version) far more engaging than any of those here.

In terms of story, the movie is leagues above the books, though this is not a difficult accomplishment. Movie Grey is a far more sympathetic character. Unlike the book, he never rapes Anastasia and is very respectful of consent: when she tells him "No" and "Don't touch me," he obeys instantly. His stalker tendencies from the book are either toned down or played for laughs (see above). The scene where he tracks Ana down at the bar is reframed as him, having met her friend Jose, being worried about Jose possibly taking advantage of her because he recognizes the type. Instead of pressuring and rushing Ana through the negotiation process, he encourages her to educate herself (even supplying her with a computer) and a long time lapse occurs as she does due diligence.

The film introduces themes of Grey's troubled past: being abused as a child, being sexually abused as a teen, and his pathological desire to please others after being adopted. In this light, his attraction to BDSM is as a coping mechanism. The film is dotted with him making efforts to be more of a normal human being for Ana's sake (which is almost touching at times) and also contrasts it with his desire to inflict pain. This Jekyll and Hyde aspect could have been made much more central earlier to give the movie greater pathos.

In fact, there are two directions the director could have taken the film, either of which would have been ultimately more rewarding than what was produced. The first plays to her strengths at quirky dark humor, as shown in the negotiation scene. Had she gone the tongue-in-cheek "Kinky Cinderella" story route, we would have had a sexual comedy to rival Secretary. The other was to give a darker edge, exploring the theme of the abuse cycle and how it perpetuates through its victims. Make Grey even more obviously desperate and conflicted, with the monster he unleashes on Ana in the end far worse than what she did see. As a more psychological thriller, the kink becomes a symbol for Grey's self-torture.

50 Shades of Grey is not the end-all-be-all of kinky erotica some hoped/feared it would be. It has a number of bright spots, but these are mired by the mundane surroundings. The director deserves a lot of credit for making it as watchable as it ended up being, because this could have been far worse. In the end, though, it could not burst free from the restraints placed on it by the novels.